A LAYPERSONS GUIDE TO SOME PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUES
(These descriptions are intended to foster understanding for the average individual and do not reflect the full range, impact and specific clinical terminology of the behaviors addressed.)
NOTE: ANYONE FOR WHOM ANY OF THESE ISSUES LEADS TO THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE OR INJURY TO SELF OR OTHERS SHOULD SEEK IMMEDIATE PROFESSIONAL ASSISTANCE.
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Abuse
Abuse means to treat another being physically, emotionally, verbally or in any other way… wrongfully or harmfully or to use and/or influence a person incorrectly or improperly. It applies to all types of injurious or improper treatment. It also includes misuse, and maltreatment of individuals, especially physically or sexually. Abuse also extends to verbal issues such as to speak insultingly, cruelly or to revile. Abuse often includes deception.
CHILD ABUSE includes beating, neglect, or other mistreatment of a child by a parent, guardian or any individual in a position of power or authority over a child.
SEXUAL ABUSE means to knowingly cause another person to engage in an unwanted sexual act by force, threat or coercion of any type including misuse of positions of trust and authority. This includes sexual activity that is deemed improper or harmful, as between an adult and a minor or with a person of diminished mental capacity. Abuse victims, perpetrators and those close to them should seek professional assistance to deal with the ramifications of this behavior.
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Addiction
Any time a person continues to exhibit harmful or obsessive behavior, it can be said that they are addicted. There are many, many types of addictions, from gambling, to sex, to pornography, to drugs and alcohol. The person addicted and those who have interpersonal relationships with the addict almost always need professional assistance to successfully manage the addiction.
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ADHD
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a behavioral and developmental disorder which usually becomes apparent during the preschool and early school years. It can be a lifelong challenge extending well into adulthood. There are three primary characteristics of ADHD: Inattention; Hyperactivity; Impulsivity and both the individual with the disorder and those interacting with persons having this disorder may need assistance in developing coping and management strategies.
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Anger/Emotion Management
If losing their temper, frequent crying, withdrawal, recurrent confrontation, disproportionate outrage, ongoing feelings of aggravation or exasperation or other significant emotional concerns or displays leave one anxious, uncomfortable, embarrassed, regretful and feeling out of control, counseling could be beneficial. Being in control of one’s emotions rather than having our emotions control us is a laudatory goal and basic societal expectation. A professional counselor can help clients understand the dynamics of their feelings and assist them to both feel in control and be in control of their emotions.
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Anxiety
We all experience some anxiety at times, but anxiety that may require counseling can be exemplified as strong and unpleasant feelings of nervousness or distress in response to a situation, condition, person or event often accompanied by physiological effects such as nausea, trembling, breathlessness, sweating, and rapid heartbeat. Counseling can often assist in successfully managing this painful and often debilitating problem.
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Body Image
Body image refers to how an individual perceives and feels about their own body’s appearance. It is believed that the anorexic/bulimic eating disorders are at least partially the result of negative body image. Unfortunately, many people have a skewed or unrealistic body image. They look in the mirror and may see something very different than the real reflection – for example, someone thin may see someone with excess body fat, even though none exists. Professional assistance is often the only way issues in this arena can be successfully understood and managed.
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Depression
Depression is a mood disorder that is characterized by an extended period of sadness. Symptoms frequently include disturbances in patterns of eating, sleeping, emotions and management of routine daily activities. Depression can diminish your senses and make you both feel and act less alert, less attentive, and less “sharp”. Most people are saddened by certain aspects or events in their lives but if the depression is constant and long lasting it may be time to seek assistance. People who suffer from depression often feel helpless and that their “down” mood is permanent. Counseling can provide valuable insights and strategies to better manage these moods.
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Divorce Adjustment
This is the process of changing from a married to a non-married environment. Children are frequently the ones who struggle the most in the divorce process and often need someone objective, who is not directly involved, to help them understand and manage their feelings. When people say they are in an “adjustment period” they typically mean they are going through a process of change and are searching for some level of balance or acceptance with the single environment and its impact on themselves and others. All the symptoms of anxiety, depression, loss and grieving may be part of this process. A professional counselor can help adults who separate and/or their children find a positive path through this difficult maze.
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Family and/or Relationship Problems
Everyone wants a life that’s peaceful, with fulfilling and pleasant relationships. Unfortunately, relationships consist of people and people can be very complicated. Every person has their own feelings, needs and wants. It is human nature to feel that our own needs are more important than those of others or to view life primarily from our own perspective. This can lead to misunderstanding, conflict or withdrawal. If any family or other relationships have gotten to the point of constant silent treatment, frustration, pain, unhappiness, arguing or fighting, and seem ready to explode, it may be time to contact a counselor. Learning to better understand and communicate is an important step. In families, each member can have their own way of interacting. Some are leaders, some are followers, some try to control the entire situation while others may try to hide in the background and not make waves. These roles come about for many reasons; personality, age, talents, abilities, etc. Having a professional help those involved understand relationship dynamics, norms and manipulative strategies can be the first step in building the happy, fulfilling relationships everyone seeks.
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Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation Issues
Gender identity consists of one’s internal personal sense of being a man or woman (boy or girl). Gender role is the set of societal and behavioral norms that are considered appropriate for individuals of a specific sex in the context of a particular culture. Sexual orientation is a pattern of emotional, romantic, and/or sexual attractions to males, females, both or neither. Ambiguity, confusion, anxiety or distress regarding one’s sense of maleness or femaleness frequently creates serious internal dissonance. This process often includes awareness/acceptance and/or confusion/rejection of one’s biological sex. With the assistance of a professional counselor what seems to be irresolvable confusion and frustration can be resolved into a positive life plan.
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Grief
The sense of loss and anxiety felt when facing impending death or other catastrophic or life changing experiences can be described as grief. It is often surprising to learn grief can also be felt when what most would feel are positive events occur, such as marriage, the birth of a child, graduation, etc. Many emotions are involved with grief such as denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Each individual’s grief experiences are different. A counselor can help navigate through these painful passages.
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Infertility Issues
Inability to conceive due to any reason often has a very debilitating impact on the individuals and relationships involved. All the elements of family dynamics, personal gender identity and security issues, loss and grieving symptoms, relationship dynamics and the challenges of changing expectations are involved in this issue and contribute to making this a very complex problem. Anxiety and depression can be serious side effects if these issues are not well managed. Counseling can help design and implement strategies to deal with these concerns.
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LGBT Issues
Those who identify as a member of this community may deal with stressors not experienced by so-called straight people. Coming out to family, dealing with prejudice and bullying and discovering who you really are in the face of societal expectations can lead to higher levels of depression and anxiety. Counseling can help manage those choices, emotions and difficulties that are often unique to those who are LGBT. Anger, frustration, anxiety, self-image ambiguity, depression and even suicidal ideations can become part of this picture. Developing the understanding and skills to successfully manage these issues can lead to a fulfilling, peaceful, happy life experience.
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Loss
Often mental, emotional and even debilitating feelings and challenges, very similar to those experienced with grief and grieving, are also symptomatic of this sense of loss. Any change, negative or positive can create a sense of loss. Strategies and skills to understand, reframe and cope, which are often developed in counseling, can help make this manageable.
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Marriage Problems
The family is viewed by many as one of the most important basic units in society and marriage is often cited as the foundation of the family. Marriage is a difficult, complicated and emotional relationship. It involves individuals who are trying to build a life together. Each of them goes into the relationship with hopes, dreams and expectations that aren’t always shared with their partner. As time goes on, each one of these partners can become so busy with their own lives, problems, interests and even addictions, that they lose touch with each other. This causes misunderstandings and loneliness and if it continues too long, it can cause a marriage to fail. Adding, finances, sex, unmet expectations, children, and sometimes problems with extended family can lead to explosive situations. A professional counselor can help each person open up about their feelings, needs, wants, and frustrations. It is important to learn better ways to communicate and take steps to heal the misunderstandings and pain. Learning these skills can help marriages grow toward the closeness and joy both desire.
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OCD
An obsession is the inability of a person to stop thinking about a particular topic or feeling a certain emotion without a high amount of anxiety. When obsessed, an individual continues the obsession in order to avoid the consequent anxiety. Compulsions are often the inseparable companions of obsessions; specific behaviors must be repeatedly engaged in order to meet the requirements of the obsession. In the case of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), the individual may have only the obsessions, only the compulsions or both. An example of an obsession in OCD is a person who can’t stop thinking about dirt or germs that they could come into contact with. In this case, thinking about the dirt and/or germs is the obsession. Excessive, constant and repeated hand washing may be the compulsion which accompanies this obsession. OCD behavior can be socially debilitating unless understanding and skills are developed to keep it under an acceptable level of control.
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Pornography Addiction
This powerful addiction can ruin employment, relationships, self esteem, etc. and is characterized by chronic pornography-seeking behavior despite the harmful potential and real negative consequences to self, others and one’s important relationships. Symptoms usually include an intense psychological fixation with viewing and or acquiring pornography. The psychological and physical craving for this stimulus can become all-encompassing and a person may experience physiological as well as psychological withdrawal symptoms caused by the removal of the stimulus. A professional counselor with training and experience working with this challenge can help individuals realize they are addicted, understand this addiction, identify the triggers, and plan strategies and techniques to manage and alter these dynamics.
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Post Adoption Issues
Often these symptoms do not appear until long after the adoption has been completed. Adoption itself can be one of the most complex and serious challenges a family or individual may ever face. All the elements of family dynamics, loss and grieving symptoms, relationship issues and the challenges of change can be part of the adoption process. In particular, frustration can grow with adoptees who successfully or unsuccessfully seek birth parents. Counseling can provide understanding and strategies for these post adoption challenges. Linda Protzman does not perform pre-adoption home studies, evaluations, or counseling. She does assist all involved individuals who are struggling with post adoption issues.
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Self-Image Issues
Self-image refers to how an individual perceives and feels about themselves and how they believe they are perceived and seen by others. Negative self-image may or may not be based on objective reality. Many people have a skewed or unrealistic self- image. As they evaluate themselves they may see something very different than what is seen by others. Professional assistance can be helpful to individuals who are concerned about either overly negative or overly positive self-image dilemmas.
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Sexual Abuse
To knowingly cause another person to engage in an unwanted sexual act by force, threat, coercion of any type including misuse of positions of trust and authority. This includes sexual activity that is deemed improper or harmful, as between an adult and a minor or with a person of diminished mental capacity. Abuse victims, perpetrators and those close to them should seek professional assistance to deal with the ramifications of this behavior.
CONTACT LINDA FOR A $25 INITIAL CONSULTATION TO SEE IF SHE CAN HELP.
NOTE: ANYONE FOR WHOM ANY OF THESE ISSUES LEADS TO THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE OR INJURY TO SELF OR OTHERS SHOULD SEEK IMMEDIATE PROFESSIONAL ASSISTANCE.